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By Aviva Gat
A Ketubah ceremony is not to be confused with a wedding ceremony. The Jewish Ketubah marriage contract is actually signed at its own separate ceremony that takes place before the wedding. It is often a much more intimate event and includes its own rituals and practices.
Keep reading if you are planning a Jewish wedding and want to know more about the ceremony for signing your Ketubah.
What is a Ketubah ceremony?
A Ketubah ceremony is a secluded ritual regarding the Jewish marriage contract. During this ceremony, the Ketubah document is filled out, reviewed, and signed by the Ketubah witnesses.
A Ketubah outlines the terms of marriage for the couple. These terms, which may be traditional or more secular, must be agreed upon for a Jewish wedding to take place. Once the Ketubah is signed, the couple is free to complete the wedding ceremony and effectuate their marriage.
When is the Ketubah ceremony?
The Ketubah ceremony takes place before the wedding. Today, most Jewish couples will conduct the Ketubah ceremony a half hour to an hour before going under the Chuppah. This is convenient because all parties are already present in one place for both marriage rituals. Orthodox couples might choose to conduct the Ketubah ceremony during the husband’s Tisch ceremony, which takes place right before the wedding.
On the other hand, some couples may choose to sign the Ketubah even earlier so that it does not interfere with their “first look” before the wedding. These couples might sign their Ketubah the day before the wedding.
Who is present at the Ketubah ceremony?
Who is present at the Ketubah ceremony depends on the religious affiliation of the couple and their preferences. For a Ketubah ceremony to take place, the groom, a rabbi, and two witnesses are necessary. Today, most secular couples also include the bride in the ceremony, as well as close family and friends.
The two witnesses are the most important participants in the ceremony. It is their job to watch carefully to ensure the Ketubah is filled out correctly. Their signatures are required for the document’s validity. Jewish law states that Ketubah witnesses should be virtuous, observant, bar-miztvahed men who are not related by blood or marriage to either the bride or groom. [1] Today, most conservative and reform rabbis will accept women as Ketubah witnesses. Couples generally choose their close friends or people they care deeply about to participate as their witnesses at the Ketubah ceremony.
What happens during a Ketubah ceremony?
A Ketubah document is filled out and signed during the Ketubah ceremony. The ceremony usually starts with the rabbi explaining the terms defined in the document. The rabbi will fill out the document with the date, location, and names of the bride and groom as well as their parents. Everything must be filled out carefully and precisely to ensure the legitimacy of the Ketubah.
Once the document is filled out, the participants enact a “kinyan,” which is the ritual of when the husband barters for the exclusive rights to marital relations with the bride. Contrary to popular belief, the husband does not “acquire” his wife the way he might acquire an object, rather he is acquiring the right to be with her alone.[2]
During the kinyan the groom barters for his exclusive rights and accepts his obligations according to the Ketubah contract.[3] In the ritual, the rabbi or a witness will take the place of the bride and hand a handkerchief or garment to the groom. Once the groom grasps the cloth the kinyan is made and the groom is obligated under the contract.
Witnesses should take care to observe the ceremony and will sign the document once the kinyan is completed. According to Jewish law, only the witnesses are required to sign the Ketubah during the Ketubah ceremony.[4]
It is interesting to note that Jewish law does not require signatures from the rabbi, groom, or bride. Today couples may choose to sign their Ketubah during the Ketubah ceremony to signify their commitment to each other.
This completes the Ketubah ceremony, however, the Ketubah does not go into effect until after specific blessings are recited at the wedding ceremony and the couple unites under one roof or spends time alone together.
Preparing for your Ketubah ceremony
Understanding the Ketubah ceremony is an important part of planning your Jewish wedding. Keep reading to learn more about Ketubahs.
- What is a Jewish Ketubah marriage contract
- How to choose a Ketubah text
- How to fill out a Ketubah
- Ketubah FAQs
[1] Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan (1983). Made in Heaven. Moznaim Publishing Corporation.
[2] Student, G. (2015, January 27). Do Husbands Own Their Wives? Torah Musings. https://www.torahmusings.com/2015/01/husbands-wives/
[3] Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan (1983). Made in Heaven. Moznaim Publishing Corporation.
[4] Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan (1983). Made in Heaven. Moznaim Publishing Corporation.
By Aviva Gat
Aviva Gat is a journalist, author, and content writer specializing in various topics including religion, culture, health, & technology. She has a B.S. in Journalism and Religion from Boston University and an M.B.A. from Tel Aviv University.